The day I lost my ring.

It actually happened yesterday.

I was at a cataract camp in Lundu Hospital for a charity camp. 

It's my carelessness that I didn't notice the hole in the OT scrub. Damn it.

It's my mistake that my wedding band fell through the hole and I didn't realise it sooner. Damn it.

Even if I dropped it, I would have found it lying somewhere (wounded) on the OT floor because I searched for it the very moment I realised it was not in my pocket. 

I would have found it because I bent down and tearfully scrutinized every corner and every meter square of the OT area. 

I would have found it when I went agonizingly searching through the linen room, emptying the contents of the bags and then to going through the bags one-by-one. 

Believe me, I did.

My staff there and even my big boss helped searching. And we couldn't find it.

It may be an accident on my part, but it was definitely not unintentional for that someone who picked it up and never gave it back to me. DAMN IT! 

SOMEBODY'S HANDS WERE DEFINITELY 'DIRTY' IN THAT OT.

I was all about charity BUT NOT THAT CHARITABLE!!! 

GIVE ME BACK MY WEDDING BAND, you #@*%$#??!!^!!!

I gave my service and time and sacrifice my family and yet that was how I was treated. This was a great challenge if it was a lesson from Him. *sighs* Very much conflicted now... So tormented.... Very depressing.... 

*i should have hung my ring in my necklace*
*i should have worn a necklace to hang my ring*
*i should have been more careful*
*i should have checked earlier*
*so many should haves and i m feeling very sad and stupid*
*now i miss the feeling of touching it in my ring finger*
*i miss rolling my wedding band around my ring finger*
*now there is a shadow of emptiness in my ring finger*

For once, Dear Hubby was equally as upset as I was. But even then, he knew the exact things to say and comfort me. 

Him: The ring is just a symbol of our marriage. It may be gone but we still have our love and our family. You see our love is out there destroying her toys. 

Me: But...... 

Him: We can always get another one.

Me: But it was the one you put on for me at our wedding.....

Him: I put on our engagement ring on your ring finger first leh... Lucky not that one stolen!

*because that has a diamond on it!*

For someone who would take somebody else's wedding ring, knowing the sentimental value it carried, you are a coward little piece of nothing!!!  You freaking useless thief not just stole my ring but also the sweet loving memory of my wedding!!! I don't know who taught you to steal but I hope you don't tell your children that you got that ring from stealing!!!! In fact, I hope you are not married or have children yet because the world doesn't need another you! And I hope you at least use my Tiffany&Co for proper use - to feed your family or pay for education or treat your sick family and NOT for alcohol or drugs or cigarettes! 

Despite all that... I am still hoping that it is still lost. Not stolen. 
We offered RM500 for anyone who return my wedding band... It is just mixed gold, not pure gold.... 

Do take the money and you will get a thicker gold necklace!

Very guarded prognosis.... but we are hoping.....
WHAT AN EXPENSIVE AND PAINFUL LESSON TO LEARN --> CHECK YOUR POCKETS!

*so heartbroken*

A Dotty Day. Happy 1st Birthday my Maya!

After a whole month of hollering about Baby Maya's first birthday, it was accomplished! 

After a whole month of planning, it was DONE! With dotty poxy flying colours!!! 

I was quite proud of the party I hosted. Yeah...self-bragging... let me be ~~ lalalallalala!!!!! 

Dear Hubby said I did a wonderful job and I went skipping in rainbows and cloud nine!

Everything was planned with love, executed with details, orientated to suit her (and our budget of course!) and her daily routine so that she won't be overwhelmed by the crowd of well-wishers. 

First and foremost, I would like to take this chance to really thank ALL OF YOU WHO CAME (especially LeSista!) and showed your loves and blessings to our little angel turning one. Dear Hubby and I really really appreciate the time you had taken off to attend this party, even if it was just for a short while, and taking the extra effort and dress your little ones in polka dots too!!! So sporting laaa you all!! *twinkling eyes* Thank you~~~ We hope all of you had a dotty time there! If there were any kekurangans or some things that we overlooked at our party, we apologise sincerely ya... This is kinda my first time hosting party (all on my own, withOUT an event organiser!), even if it was a just moderately small party, we wholeheartedly hope that you all had a good time! And special gratitude for those who were not able to make it, but still send their love in forms of angpaos and pressies too... Really very heartwarming~~ Thank you!!! Kamsiah~~~

Enough feeling feeling all.... Read this post if you want emo emo stuff!

Paiseh to have kept many of you waiting for this post.... Many have been patiently waiting for the pictures of baby girl's birthday.... hahahhaha..... so..... here is it! 

Baby Maya's Polka Dot First Birthday Party in gruesome details...

This is gonna be one loooong post.... with loads of pictures!!!

A family affair!!! In the past, whenever I looked at any mother-daughther wearing the same clothes, I went chuckling to myself... Hahahhaha... Seriously~ Never say never.. Never laugh at other people! HAHAHHAH! Now, it was ME who did the same thing... LOL~ LeSista got me that polka dot dress many many years ago, it was just chucked at the back of my closet and just last night I realised, it was freaking the same pattern as this black and white polka dot dress that I bought for baby from Hush Puppies! Same dot size, same colour! What a coincidence, as if it was meant to be!!! Thus, in a split instinct, I decided to wear the same as her. (!!!YES I DID!!!) And then I promised never to embarrass her again (maybe) by NOT wearing same baju as her again (maybe). Hahahhaa~~~

Our birthday girl in her black & white polka dot dress~~ So sweet and cute my darling right.....wearing her signature pout!!! and learning to split?!!? Her red and orange hair clips were actually also polka dots (!!! YES!!!)  but they are too small and this subject was too active for me to get a clear good picture!!

Selfie time! I matched my black & white polka dot dress with faux pearl stud earrings, a dangling dreamy pearl necklace and pearly bracelet (gotten from LeSista!). If you squint, perhaps you can spot my super colourful polka dot (!!!YES!!!) nail art on top of my white manicure! Yes, purposely for this occasion~~~ lallalala...... I had on a bright orange hairband with blue polka dot (!!!YES!!!) also...

Thank you LeSista for coming and joining us!!! You might not know but your presence here made me feel especially warm and fuzzy inside!!! I love having you here, I love hanging out and talking nonsense with you... I super love our sisterly time! Thank you for loving my baby so much and Baby Maya also loves her yiyi very much!!! 

And again, with such a coincidence, LeSista's polka dot top was black with white dots!

 

Baby girl de birthday shoes!!! Finally we found it~~ Lovely pristine soft white ballerina shoes to match her dress (thanks to YeYe and Gua Ma!!). The beautiful gold anklet with dangling bells was her birthday pressie from Yiyi! Thank you~ Upon reaching the party, which was held at Flinders Station, an Australian pizza parlour, Baby hijacked mummy's orange hairband... Well, it did looked better on her! :)))

As you all already knew, the theme of our birthday bash --> polka dot (!!!YES!!!). Many of you wondered why. See her baby picture on the left? That was my ABSOLUTE FAVOURITE PAJAMAS OF HERS!!! Her most worn baju when she was a newborn. That was exactly why... The polka dot idea stemmed from her green polka dot pants and everything else in the party was also based on this PJ of hers. And the tiger soft toy (which was mine originally) is her most favourite can't-sleep-without soft toy in the whole wide world. So, you shall come to realise (in the pictures below) that I have incorporated these into my party-planning-details.... :DDD

*super excited mode to share*

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*drum rolls*

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Ta-Daaaaaah!!!!!!

A special area dedicated for her.... with jumbo Happy 1st Birthday banner hanging over it... :DDD

Don't worry, I'll go through one-by-one haha....

This 8-inch Oreo cookie cream birthday cake was specially custom-made, with love, for Baby Maya. 

Note the greenish blue black polka dot colour (following her PJ pants) of the cake and the flower pattern (following her white top PJ details) in the front of the cake. Super love love love~~~ 

And the cutest little mini tiger icing sitting on the cake... I also love the pink MAYA KANG wordings on the cake~~ Such sweet details.... A great job done by the baker!

See the number ONE candle -->  also polka dot (!!!YES!!!), which I found online! *proud face*

Surrounding the beautiful ONEderful cake were ten cutest polka dot (!!!YES!!!) multi pastel-coloured little cupcakes! They were a mixture of vanilla strawberry, vanilla blueberry, vanilla roselle, vanilla cookie & cream, lemon lime, rich chocolate cupcakes etc...

Specially 'imported' from Singapore, from LeSista for us, were the greenish blue and yellow polka dot (!!!YES!!!) mini Nutella cupcakes. Pure heavenly and were my favourite ever cupcakes!!! 

I can pop those into my mouth, 5 biji consecutively!!! True story. 

Thank you for getting us those cupcakes and I am grateful for the trouble you went through (I know you got lost hahaha!), for Baby Maya, for me, for us. And those rich chocolate rice balls were sheer indulgence and simply downright sinful. Hahaha. Love the colour sprinkles on top of the balls.

You must have been wondering what was the bear doing there, what was it all about...

Well, you can read from the dainty introductory card HANDmade specially by yours truly! Haha.

It (not named yet, waiting for Baby Maya to name it herself one day) is actually a birthday gift from us, to her. It is a keepsake teddy bear, handmade and sewn from her outgrown baby clothes, custom made in the UK. If you scrutinize properly, you would notice that my favourite PJ of hers was embedded onto the bear, along with many other pieces of her baby clothes (baby gloves, belly binder, rompers, other PJs and white ribbon top) ... *love love love*

Seeing this bear never fails to instantly reminds me of her newborn period, which I treasure to the deepest of my heart, and thus, it serves as the best token of remembrance of our journey together. Caressing the fabrics and the prints on the bear, I know I've chosen the best memento gift. 

*mummy loves you very much* 

I purposely chose this pink-purple ladybug polka dot (!!!YES!!!) party set, simply to match the theme of the party, even though I knew that the restaurant would provide us the utensils (hah!). Just for show nia. They were totally redundant hahahaha~~ 

Also I brought along her customised photo canvas and photo frames to decorate the place. Haha. 

Happy 1st Birthday, darling girl!

Our guests arriving and digging into the food...

Love those colourful polka dot (!!!YES!!!) helium-filled balloons strewn around the place, making it more festive than ever! The whole upstairs of the pizza place was ours, very kind of the owner!

Baby girl wearing a special Birthday Girl party hat~~~ 

(got a bargain online *teeheehee*)

And the party went on..... 

I can't believe we took so many pictures that day! More than 400!!! Credits to LeSista as the free photographer of the day~~ Thank you for helping me capture those defining moments!!!

I'll try to fit everything in collages so to save time (and megabytes LOL!).

Oh boy, I hope I didn't missed anybody out!

Baby Maya said:

*thank you cousins Lewis and Joie, Faith jiejie for joining me*

*thank you all aunties, uncles also for taking the time off to come wish me and see me and sing song with me*

*thank you Baby Cara and Brandon gorgor for coming*

*thank you all daddy mummy de friends for the pressies and angpaos*

*thank you Eugene for coming and inviting me to your party*

*Uncle Goh & Auntie Zy, we finally met!*

*hahahhaa*

Thank you for coming! You guys are amazing... 

Thank you LeSista, who very kindly helped me snapped so many pictures that day and only few of her own... 

WE LOVE YOU...

Menu of the day:

Creamy mushroom soup

Garden salad with dressings

Roasted potatoes

Chicken wings with glazed honey

Crispy calamari rings

Pizzas (definitely!): Hawaiian chicken, Hawaiian tuna, pepperoni chicken etc..

Chicken bolognese spaghetti

Black pepper chicken

Mutton and potato (don't know what dish)

 I love love love the pizzas and mushroom soup! 

But the rest of the dishes were so-so, to be honest.... 

Lighting up the cute polka dot (!!!YES!!!) candle and getting ready for birthday song singing!!!

*baby stop digging your nose!*

Dear Hubby excitedly asked them to play a very very countrylike birthday song *sweat* 

Hahaha......!!!

To many many more years to come!!!

*milk bottle cheerings*

I super LOVE LOVE LOVE this picture taken by my colleague's big ass camera!

*hijacked this picture from his FB*

*have to admit, full professional photographer skill laaaa*

*thank you for helping to seize this precious moment for us!*

Cake cutting ceremony... Very poorly done by mua... Haha.. Abit keganasan lololol~~~

Yay!!! More pressies ya!!!

*mummy more excited lebih lebih*

Wahhhhh.. my lucky baby so many presents and blessings!!! 

She had just a lovely time going through the pressies and tearing them up!

*so fun to watch her so gleeful*

See the polka dot (!!!YES!!!) love-shaped stickers next to the handwritten Thank You Note? *proud*

Party favours wrapped with love and meticulously into a candy shape, also by me!

Hope everybody had a sweet sweet time!!!

THANK YOU ALL FOR COMING! 

HOPE YOU HAD A DOTILICIOUS TIME!!!

That defining moment. My Lucky One.

The day has come.

Baby Maya turns one today.

I have been daydreaming and planning about this (in my head) ever since I had her in my belly.
Really. There are many defining moments in one's life - graduating, finding the dream job, first house, first car, wedding day, getting pregnant, delivery day.. and then this -> your baby first birthday.

My lucky one... turning lucky one. *get it?*

It is a bittersweet day. It makes me sad in a way it thrills me that we have shared this first year together. She doesn't really need me as she used to and I am sad about it. But still very proud and happy that she is entering her new stage of her life. Feels like just yesterday when I was screaming and agonizing in labour. In a blink of eye, with you all as my witnesses, the baby stage is over. My heart just twisted as I typed this. Super siao. I am happy nonetheless!!! But I cried as I know the baby stage is gone forever.*happy tears* As crazy and as sampat as I am, I love love watching her grow each day, reaching her milestone and learning new things everyday. Her progress, at times, stunned me. Many times she just surprised me. Actually, it is ME, who got surprised to see her grow and learn, sometimes without me. *sniffs*

Especially I think since she is my first, knowing that all the firstS with my first newborn have run their course. Such a big transition. Such a concrete milestone.

I am super emotional today. So tough. It is a new phase, not just for baby, but for me as well. I am not a feeling-oriented kind of person, I don't get swell up with tears easily. But this journey, this past one year, I know... despite trying to prove otherwise and still act icy-queen macho and all..... I have become a mummy. Not just your average mother kinda of tag name, but a real worry-freak, cautious domestified kinda of almost turned into naggy old granny label. Hate to admit this, but it is true. And you know what, I am happy with the MUMMY tag :) because now, I can't imagine my life otherwise. I really can't imagine my life without her.


So.... My dear Baby Maya....

A year ago, as I cuddled you in our VIP room in Rejang Medical Centre Sibu, I know already.... that you have turned my whole world upside down. You came and you conquered and you made my life even more beautiful that I can ever imagined. I looked down at you and saw this precious little bundle. You introduced to me, a love so strong that I couldn't comprehend...that I don't fully understood - a mother's love. As I tried to grasp this new role of mine and apprehend the tremendous ever-growing love overflowing out from my heart and soul, I thank you for letting me be your mummy that day.

And in your second month, you were crying and crying every evening, refusing to sleep even as I rocked you the whole evening and sang to you. You cried your eyes out and my heart bled. And then I remembered, I was crying with you too. Because I felt so lost too, I kept blaming myself for being such a lousy mother. I didn't know if I was doing the right thing. I didn't know what you wanted then. As the time ticked by, once I got to know you, once I understood your body language, once I appreciated every inch of you, the whole of you.... I got better. We got better. We got better at hugging and snuggling and cuddling each other. And I thank you for letting mummy a chance to learn.

From third month onwards, you learnt so much in such a short time. Everyday I watched you picked up a new move, a new trick. You rolled over, crawled and sat. You tried your first puree and solids and even learnt to spat out food you disliked. You are the world's fussiest and most difficult food critic!!! And I had to search for the recipe and try everyday to make a dish that you would eat. And when you got tired of the taste, I had to find another 'favourite' for you again. As you zoomed past the house in your walker, as you climbed up and down the house, as you clicked clucked your tongue, as you sang and talked and chuckled to yourself while playing with your tiger soft toy... I realised how fast time flies. When you crunched up your face into your signature 'pretend cry face', I couldn't helped but laughed at your cheekiness. Sometimes I feel that you are growing too fast a pace that I couldn't keep up! When you hit a milestone, I was swelling with pride and cheering on for you (and posting videos and pictures up on Instagram), but at the same time, my heart yearned. I know... that as you grow up into the cutest little girl, you are pulled away from being a baby. My baby.

*can't believe I am actually crying typing this post*
*happy longing tears*

Giving you the most special, most tentative first birthday party was like my ultimate to-do in the whole wide world.

And because your memory is not that good, that's okay. That is why I am here. 

Because I will remember it all.... for you.

Mummy will capture every defining moments for you.

It might not be the most lucrative or expensive luxurious one, but it is all personalised and intimate. It is all for her, about her, us and the memory. 

My Lucky One,
I love you more than words can say.
I love you more than anything.
I will always love you more.

Happy first birthday, baby girl.
Mummy loves you.

Mum's cooking is the best.

'Mum' in this context would normally refers to my mum. But this time, it points to yours truly blogger here. It is about my healthy choice of cooking for my little one.

If you are anything like me, who tries her best to always prepare the best for her family, then you should head to this organic shop in Kuching that sells awesomely wide variety of organic choices of organic food!!! I am no health freak. I love my Pringles and chocolates. However, for Baby Maya, I release my rigid mindset (that healthy is uncool. LOL!) and allow myself to try the more healthy options. Since healthy is totally 'in' and gaining popularity now, as more and more of us are understanding and aware of the importance of health, I shall not think that it is uncool anymore. Hahahaha....

Few weekends ago, I ventured into Mady Organic Food Store (no financial interest, just sharing) located on the ground floor of Cold Storage Green Heights Mall. Parking is only RM0.50 for the first 30mins and it is free of charge during the weekend. Neat huh! Therefore, this is my favourite place to stock up on organic goods and if you are looking for fresh Australian imported products, Cold Storage is the place to go! Two birds with one stone. 

A few of my friends have been asking me what I bought there, ever since I checked in on Facebook stating I shopped there. You know... you always walk past the shop and never really know what the shop sells. So, I figure, let me blog and share about it!

But first, a selfie in the shop...

Rows and rows, stacks and stacks of organic stuff for health conscious people. From beans to grains to noodles to virgin oil to sauces to organic vegetables... they have it all! And to my surprise, organic products are expensive! More than what I have anticipated and expected. It's like, you have to be rich to be healthy. 
-_- Otherwise, grow it yourself. 

The FB page (that I have been faithfully following) mummies all sworn by this Virgin Coconut Oil or vco for short. I don't know what brand they use but many of them are using and I have been looking up and down for it in Kuching. Found it in this shop and I am sooooo delighted!!! FINALLY AT LAST!!! 
Composed of medium chain triglycerides and lauric acid (the good fatty acids, also found in breast milk), it is supposedly to help increase immune system and improves digestion. Just a few drops of vco into porridge, into the steamed cakes (read below) and into everything!!! And it smells heavenly! True coconut oil extract. Mady Organic sells at RM33.90 for a big bottle like this.

Other things that I managed to snag:

Molasses sugar - it is a byproduct of refining sugarcane into sugar - that I am very eager to buy to bake some cakes for my darling, after seeing some mothers share their recipe in the FB page.Organic yellow lentils - I do not know how to cook and what to use it for yet.. hahaha. I have tried mixing it into her porridge few times and she seemed to be okay with it. Organic millet, of course. I was actually looking for quinoa also but too bad it sold out. I do not know any other organic shops here. If you do know, please let me know okay!

I have also gotten the organic carrots and broccoli. And some rolled oats for myself.
Baby steps to healthier lifestyle choices. :)))

They also have their own organic vegetarian food cafe. I had their signature Mady Organic fried rice and tapao-ed Kerabu fried rice for Dear Hubby. We were famished that day - finished eating only I realized that I forgot to snap a picture to show you! Paiseh ah.. Haha.... Anyways,  quite honestly I didn't quite enjoyed the my organic fried rice - too many pineapples and raisins for my likings. And his? Too spicy. You can go and try and conclude for yourself. :PP

Earnestly, I came home and cooked for Baby Maya with all the organic goods that I just bought.
Organic millet, carrot, broccoli, marinated minced breast chicken fillet with onions and sesame oil, apples and 2-3 drops of vco. 

Voila!
Millet porridge with all the goodness nutritious yumminess overflowing in one small bowl. 

Hot steamed cupcakes! Super simple recipe, super fast and easy. All-purpose flour, fresh milk, molasses sugar, baking powder, few drops of vco, one medium size banana, 1-2 drops of vanilla extract. Don't mind the mess hahahaa...
Blue cupcakes -> Japanese steamed cupcakes.
Pink and brown colour ones -> banana steamed cupcakes.
Dear Hubby said baby quite enjoyed having one whole cupcake, all for herself, for breakfast the next day!

This is pumpkin porridge that I cooked for her lunch. Bario rice, millet, pumpkin, potato and cabbage. 

Another batch of 'set' lunches for baby girl... Apple puree on top with chinese red radish + carrots underneath. So far she hasn't quite liken the taste of apple. Hahaha.... Will keep trying!

Packing her lunch bag has become part of my daily early morning routine. :DDD
Chicken + potato + tomato puree, one banana, some chocolate biscuits and the green tupperware below -> congee, cooked in the morning to go with the chicken puree.

For the following day - same chicken porridge for lunch but more snacks for her daddy (to prevent him from stealing her food!) - rice crackers, white chocolate raisin cookie and Munchy's cheese cream biscuit.

Recently there is a new buzz about homemade salmon floss (ah-huh... homemade!) and I am determined to try it next weekend... or soon-ish... :PPP